


Keep it Together

by frankiezee



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Grief/Mourning, Multi, Original Character Death(s), Panic Attacks, Slow Build, Stilinski Family Feels, slow build to sterek sorry guyssssssssss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-22
Updated: 2013-10-22
Packaged: 2017-12-30 04:17:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frankiezee/pseuds/frankiezee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Stiles gripped the steering wheel of his blue jeep firmly beneath his hands as he passed the weary sign welcoming him to Beacon Hills. It had been two years since Stiles had last visited his hometown, and eight years since he had moved away after high school. </i>
</p><p> </p><p>Or</p><p>The one where Stiles' comes home to Beacon Hills to grieve, and might be a bit surprised at who he finds comfort from.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep it Together

**Author's Note:**

> Panic attack is fairly NON-descriptive, not much detail and dealt with in a paragraph. 
> 
> The title comes from a London Grammar song 'cause I suck at titles.
> 
> Derek doesn't actually appear until next chapter if you want to wait until I've updated this story a bit more.
> 
> Anyway, I've had this idea in my head for yonks and it took over the other fic I'm working on. Might take me a few weeks to update though as I have 5 assignments due in the next two weeks. Oh, criticism/thoughts welcome!

Stiles gripped the steering wheel of his blue jeep firmly beneath his hands as he passed the weary sign welcoming him to Beacon Hills. It had been two years since Stiles had last visited his hometown, and eight years since he had moved away after high school. He’d come home to visit plenty of times during college, but in the five years since he graduated, his life had taken over and he’d only made the trip home three times. 

The first time was when his best friend Scott married his high school sweetheart. He wouldn’t have missed it for the world, especially since he was the best man. Despite the time and distance that had kept them apart; Skype, plenty of Xbox live sessions and a lifetime of history meant that Stiles had never lost touch with his friend, especially since Scott was basically like a brother to him.

The next time he’d returned was when Scott and Allison welcomed their first child, the adorable little Ruby. Scott had called him frantically when Allison had gone into labor and Stiles had driven straight to the airport. He’d caught the next flight home and even forked out the money for a taxi to the hospital, arriving just as Scott got to hold his newborn for the first time. There may have been some tears when Stiles was the next to hold her, and he vowed from that day on to always spoil her whenever Scott or Allison brought little Ruby to visit him in San Francisco. And spoil her, he did. He was pretty sure by now ruby had a collection of ten t-shirts acclaiming how great her ‘favourite Uncle’ was in some way or another. He couldn’t resist them, okay? They made her look too cute, it should’ve been illegal.

The third and final time he’d been back to Beacon Hills was when he brought his fiancé home to visit. Vicky had already met his friends when they’d been to visit, and Stiles often forced his Dad to take some well-needed time off work to visit him in San Francisco. So while they were already very enamored with his partner, Vicky had wanted to see the town Stiles grew up in. They’d visited Beacon Hills just under two years ago to officially announce their engagement, staying for a couple of days before heading back to San Fran.

He’d always wanted to escape from Beacon Hills, especially after what had been a shaky last few year of high school, but he’d always missed his Dad like crazy. They’d been close when Stiles was growing up, the death of his mother pushing them apart before pulling them closer together. Stiles always missed him along with the memories of his mother whenever he felt a bout of loneliness. But he hadn’t been lonely, not really, not with Vicky around, his beautiful coworker turned fiancé who was soon to become his wife. 

Only she would never be his wife. Their wedding would have been in six weeks. But a drunk driver had put an end to it, mounting the curb and crashing into Vicky as she was walking home from work late one evening. 

To think that when everything in his life was working out, Stiles’ world had come crashing down so close to the wedding? It just seemed like some kind of twisted joke. Stiles had been a mess for the funeral, with both his Dad and Scott flying in to support him while he tried to make sense of such a tragic accident. But he’d gotten through it, along with Vicky’s family and their group of colleagues and friends. He couldn’t stand to see the sadness and pity on their faces, but he knew that they had lost her and were grieving as well.

Stiles sent his Dad and Scott packing after a week. His Dad was the Sherriff of their small town and he knew the department would need him, and Scott had a very pregnant wife and cranky toddler at home to look after. He’d insisted that he’d be fine, that he’d take some time off work to figure things out. 

It wasn’t until he decided to collect Vicky’s things from work three weeks after the accident that he realised how shattered things really were. He experienced his first panic attack in years just from walking into the building’s lobby, realizing how much of Vicky was tied to the workplace. They’d both met at the publishing company as interns, and became immediate friends, before spending the next five years as coworkers and lovers. He didn’t realise how intertwined those parts of his life were until he was straining for air, panting in the foyer as the receptionist tried to calm him down. He waited until his breathing had evened out before calming himself enough to ride the elevator upstairs, where he gave his boss his immediate resignation.

Which lead him to going back to his apartment and packing the contents of his life into the back of his car, and driving home.

Home. He hadn’t thought of Beacon Hills as his home in so many years, but suddenly he couldn’t stand the thought of staying in San Francisco. Everything there reminded him of Vicky. Sure, there were plenty of good memories, and he’d loved that city from the moment he’d set foot in it. Compared to the claustrophobic nature of a small town like Beacon Hills, San Francisco was like a giant playground in his college years. But their apartment, his work, the whole town just screamed out Vicky’s name to him. Reminding him of what he’d lost. He couldn’t stay.

So now, despite being 26 years old, he found himself without a job, finishing a drive across the state to move back in with his father. He failed at biting back his slightly manic laughter as he thought about how much his life had changed in under a month.

As he pulled into the familiar driveway of his Dad’s place, the very same home he’d grown up in, he was suddenly overcome with a wave of nerves. He had no idea if his Dad was home or at work, he hadn’t even called to let him know he was coming. He’d just packed up as much as he could yesterday evening before waking up at the crack of dawn to start the 8-hour drive home. He was exhausted, just hoping dearly that this ill thought out idea to come home wasn’t a mistake. 

He let the car sit idle in the drive for a few more minutes before he decided to bite the bullet, turning off the engine and jumping out of the car in one swift movement. He reached the front landing just as the door opened, his Dad standing on the other side with surprise in his eyes.

“Stiles? What are you doing here?”

Heat prickled in the corner of his eyes as he started to tear up at the sight of his father. 

“Dad,” his voice broke as he stumbled forward to grasp at his father and pull him into a hug, relishing the instant relief that came with his father’s safe arms wrapped around him.

“You should have told me you were coming, I could’ve picked you up from the airport.”

Stiles sniffed as he pulled back and wiped his eyes with the cuff of his hoodie sleeve. “I drove.”

“You what?” The Sherriff peered past his son to see the jeep sitting in the driveway. “Stiles, that’s an eight hour drive. What was so important that you drove?”

“Well I couldn’t exactly fit all of my belongings in a suitcase.”

His dad gave him one of his all-knowing detective looks as he pulled his son in for another hug. “You’re welcome here for as long as you need.” 

“Thanks Dad.”

“You hungry? We can worry about unpacking everything some other time.” His father was already walking into the kitchen and pulling out some bread to make sandwiches.

“That’d be great thanks Dad. I hope you haven’t been laxing on your diet lately, Mrs. McCall told me she’s seen you eating muffins at the coffee shop with some of the deputies.” Stiles was mostly joking, he knew his Dad had been good for the most part. He’d teamed up with Melissa, Scott’s mum, to make sure his Dad didn’t eat greasy takeout food every night, since she visited her Dad a couple of times a week and could keep an eye on him. He secretly wondered if there was a romance blossoming between the two of them, but he wasn’t certain. He was pretty sure he’d be happy for his Dad if there were something going on, but frankly he wasn’t sure if his Dad would ever be over his Mom.

They sat in the kitchen to eat lunch, the silence between them feeling comfortable, even if it was unlike Stiles to be so quiet. For once he was too tired to think of anything to say. 

He finished up his lunch and went to grab the empty plates before his Dad stopped him with a firm hand on his shoulder. “You go get some rest, I feel tired just looking at you. I’ll clean this up.”

Stiles smiled his gratitude to his father before silently exiting the room to trudge up the stairs without argument. 

His bedroom looked the same as it always had. Sure, plenty of his belongings had gone with him to College, but his Dad had left everything else the same. The snowboarder decal was still on the wall, one of the last things he’d put up with his Mum when they’d redecorated his bedroom. He’d never had the heart to pull it down, even if it made him cringe now in bad taste. He’d never gotten around to going snowboarding.

He collapsed onto his bed and relaxed. He was pretty sure it hadn’t been used in two years, but the sheets didn’t smell musty at all. As he drifted off to sleep he wondered if maybe his Dad had been expecting him after all, if he’d somehow known he’d come crawling back to Beacon Hills.

***

The next week was spent trying to sleep, eating junk food that he’d brought with him and immediately hidden from his Dad, and generally not leaving his bedroom. His dad had brought in his main duffel bag of clothes and his laptop for him on the first day, but neither of them had touched any of the other boxes that were still precariously balanced in the back of the jeep. Most of it was junk, some kitchen supplies, work stuff he probably wouldn’t need anymore, or his collection of books. But some of it was Vicky’s personal stuff, or things they’d bought together. He’d left most of their crap behind at the apartment, arranging for a friend to put it into storage for him before his lease was up, but he couldn’t just leave behind everything. Still, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to open any of those particular boxes just yet, so instead he retreated to his bedroom and watched the entirety of Battlestar Galactica, start to finish, in one week. 

On the eighth day Stiles had woken up early and headed down to the kitchen for some breakfast. He hadn’t been able to sleep for more than a few hours at a time so he figured he’d have something to eat before trying to catch another couple of hours of rest. He was pouring his cereal as he heard his Dad’s cruiser pull into the garage, obviously coming off a night shift.

“Well, well, well, look who’s returned to the land of the living.” His dad chuckled as he grabbed himself a bowl and started in on the cereal as well.

Stiles couldn’t even be bothered to protest that his Dad wasn’t meant to have Stiles’ cereal when he had his own special high-fiber one in the cupboard.

“You know I haven’t seen you come out of your bedroom in the last three days?”

“Oh.” Stiles must have only been emerging while his Dad was at work. 

“Didn’t mean to worry you, Dad.”

“It’s my job to worry, Stiles.” His Dad sighed as he took in the dejected stature of his son. “Maybe it’d do you some good if you let Scott come visit. Or you could go visit Allison and Ruby, I’m sure they’d love the company while Scott’s at work during the day.”

“Daaaad. I just want to be alone right now.” Stiles knew he sounded like a petulant child, the way he was moaning, but he couldn’t help it.

“Maybe you shouldn’t be alone right now. You haven’t been outside in a week, and I don’t even want to know how long it’s been since you showered, but considering the way you smell I’d say it’s been almost as long. You could do with some company.” 

“But Dad I-“

“Just think about it. I know it’s not any consolation, but I know what you’re going through right now.” 

Stiles grimaced as he thought about how right his dad was, how hard it had been when his mother had died. 

“I seem to remember that you didn’t let me mope around forever back then. Somehow, you managed to hold it together and be the tough one, even though you were just a kid. You helped me to not get caught up in my mind. I don’t know what would’ve happened if I didn’t have you, son.”

Stiles wasn’t sure he’d ever heard his Dad talk so much about his Mum’s passing before this moment. It had always hurt too much to talk about it, to talk about her. 

“I’m not trying to say that you shouldn’t grieve, Stiles. Just that you might get through it if you reach out to me, or to your friends. You’re not alone.”

Stiles leant over to give his Dad an awkward hug from where they sat at the kitchen table. “I love you Dad,” he whispered breathlessly into his father’s shoulder. He was sick of constantly getting emotional, but he couldn’t keep his grief locked inside 24/7. He clung to his dad while he tried not to cry for the hundredth billionth time that month. 

“I love you too, Son. I’m so proud of you, you know that? You’re so strong, your mother would have been proud of you too.”

Stiles pulled back and pretended he didn’t see the glassy appearance of his Dad’s eyes, no doubt reflecting his own equally teary eyes. 

“You should go to bed Dad, get some sleep.”

“That’s a good idea, I’ve got a double shift again this afternoon. I’ll see you for breakfast tomorrow though, how’s that sound?”

Stiles grinned. “Ok, but you won’t be eating sugary cereal again. Don’t think I didn’t notice!”

His dad laughed as he clasped his son around the back of his neck. “You’re going to punish me for that, aren’t you?”

“You betcha, maybe a nice Kale smoothie will do you for breakfast tomorrow.”

Stiles laughed, his first proper laugh since the accident, as he heard his Dad muttering profanities under his breath all the way to his bedroom. 

***

**Author's Note:**

> Come chat to me on tumblr > http://keziahahale.tumblr.com/


End file.
